XTREME QUIPS

How many archaeologists does it take to change a light bulb?
Are you kidding?! Why would we let them do that?! The broken bulb is a national treasure, pointing to our rich, rich history and culture. No, we would rather build a shrine there, and charge admission to see the ‘ancient luminosity device’…hmmm, maybe we could even sell little figurines…

How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they wouldn’t change it because it ruins their night vision.

How many fractal mathematicians does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but, good grief! I let him into the house to start working on the bulb, and by the time I got back later that day, the single 110V bulb had changed into a 6 level chandelier, with each level a smaller replica of the previous level…my energy bills are going to kill me!

How many Quantum physicists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Depends on the room size–you need to fill the room first with blind-folded scientists. Then, upon a signal, they all remove the blindfolds and look toward the general area of the ‘old’ bulb. Then, when the waveform collapses, whoever is CLOSEST to the newly ‘congealed’ bulb, grabs it, and WITHOUT blinking, makes the change. Also, this procedure MAY required one additional physicist to remove a dead cat from the room

How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?
One, but only if the light bulb really wants to change.

How many grad students does it take to change a light bulb?
One, but it takes ten years.