Category: Jokes

Apple Sues Samsung

Apple Sues Samsung

Apple is suing Samsung over alleged copyright infringement of its Auto-Correct feature. In a statement released today Apple said, ‘We’ll see those aunts in court’.

Daffy Definitions

Daffy Definitions

1. ARBITRATOR: A cook that leaves Arby’s to work at McDonalds 2. AVOIDABLE: What a bullfighter tries to do 3. BERNADETTE: The act of torching a mortgage 4. BURGLARIZE: What a crook sees with 5. CONTROL: A short, ugly...

Zombie Shorties

Zombie Shorties

Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers? No, they eat the fingers separately. What do you do when 20 zombies surround your house? Wish them happy Halloween and give them candy. Why didn’t the...

10 Things That Sound Dirty On Halloween

10 Things That Sound Dirty On Halloween

1. So…What’d you get in the sack? 2. Once you get under the sheet, start moaning and groaning!!! 3. Just hop on that broomstick and ride it! 4. Those small suckers are gone in...

The Difference Between Bird Flu and Swine Flu

The Difference Between Bird Flu and Swine Flu

My doctor just told me the primary difference between Bird Flu and Swine Flu. With Bird Flu you need a tweetment, and with Swine Flu you need an oinkment.

Romance Lives On

Romance Lives On

Grandpa and Grandpa were sitting in their porch rockers watching the beautiful sunset and reminiscing about “the good old days,” when Grandma turned to Grandpa and said, “Honey, do you remember when we first...

The Grocer’s Announcement

The Grocer’s Announcement

Our local supermarket had a sale on boneless chicken breasts, and a woman I know intended to stock up. At the store, however, she was disappointed to find only a few skimpy prepackaged portions...

Snow White

Snow White

Why did Snow White get kicked out of Disneyland? She got caught sitting on Pinocchio’s face, shouting “Lie to me! Lie to me!” ********* Snow White received a camera as a gift. She happily...

Hunting Season

Hunting Season

A young farm couple, Homer and Darlene, got married and just couldn’t seem to get enough lovin’. In the morning, before Homer left the house for the fields, they made love. When Homer came...