XTREME QUIPS

Grandpa and Grandpa were sitting in their porch rockers watching the beautiful sunset and reminiscing about “the good old days,” when Grandma turned to Grandpa and said, “Honey, do you remember when we first started dating and you used to just casually reach over and take my hand?”

Grandpa looked over at her, smiled and obligingly took her aged hand in his.

With a wry little smile, Grandma pressed a little farther, “Honey, do you remember how after we were engaged, you’d sometimes lean over and suddenly kiss me on the cheek?” Grandpa leaned slowly toward Grandma and gave her a lingering kiss on her wrinkled cheek.

Growing bolder still, Grandma said, “Honey, do you remember how, after we were first married, you’d kind of nibble on my ear?”

Grandpa slowly got up from his rocker and headed into the house. Alarmed, Grandma said, “Honey, where are you going?”

Grandpa replied, “To get my teeth!”

From Waverly Films, a story about what happens to love when people aren’t on the same level.

[Via: I Am Bored]

1. Guys may be flirting around all day, but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about….

2. Guys are more emotional then you think, if they loved you at one point, it’ll take them a lot longer then you think to let you go, and it hurts every second that they try.

3. Guys go crazy over a girl’s smile.

4. A guy who likes you wants to be the only guy you talk to.

5. Boyfriends need to be reassured often that they’re still loved.

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This is a wonderful short film about love and communication in the cold, harsh world that is the life of a single, friendless office geek. This is sure to bring a smile to your face and a tear in your eye.

[Via: GAS]

You’d think that the girl could at least ACT like she’s willing to give him what he wants.

Top ten reasons why men don’t say “I Love You”

1. They don’t mean it.
2. They want to get laid, but not *that* bad.
3. Their fathers didn’t say it to their mothers.
4. It has become a throw-away phrase.
5. They don’t want to be trapped in some long-term thing.
6. They’ve said it before and found out they were wrong.
7. They think it is much cooler to say it to other men, like Sammy and Frank.
8. It will lead to “I’ll marry you”.
9. It has become a throw-away phrase.
10. If they say it, their penises will fall off.

Top ten reasons why women want men to say “I Love You”

1. They like the words.
2. Girls, at times, think that the “words” are important.
3. They can brag to their friends that they got him to do it.
4. It makes them feel all tingly to hear it.
5. Commitment/Power evil grin
6. He ain’t gettin ANY unless he does.
7. It makes up for what a jerk he is the rest of the time.
8. It makes sex better.
9. The woman can say it back without risking rejection.
10. The woman wants to see his penis fall off.

If you are struggling to come up with something original to give to your loved on this Valentine’s Day, why not give this “fill in the blank” form a go…

Declaration of Romantic Intent